What Puts A Woman in the Mood
For women, the ultimate foreplay happens in small moments throughout the day. Diving into an article on sex, you might expect advice on love notes slipped into pockets, date nights in new locations, or, maybe, wearing a trench coat with nothing underneath—all good ideas and certainly ways to build sexiness in a relationship. But I […]
A Successful Relationship Doesn’t Always Mean Forever
What we want changes over our lifetime, and so must our relationship. In my previous post, I discussed what I call “the f*ck it fifties,” a time in a woman’s life when what we need and where we want to put our attention simply changes. Sometimes it happens when our domestic nest empties out, when our usual […]
The F-It Fifties: When the Person You Used to Be Is Gone
We change as we age. Not just physically, but who we are changes—what feels important, meaningful, and interesting, what we want and need, all evolve along the life journey. For many women, there’s a time in life when domesticity is what we want, and our role in the family is who we are. There’s also a time […]
The Key to Unshakable Safety When Speaking the Truth
True safety is being able to stay present, no matter what reaction you receive. In the previous article in this series, I suggested that women aren’t afraid of conflict itself, but what conflict has historically cost them—connection, approval, and safety. So too, I proposed “a way through.” That is, a way to speak your truth, […]
How to Be More Honest and Less Afraid of the Truth
Part 6 in a series. In the last article, I discussed the deep-seated fears associated with telling the truth and why disruption and potential loss of connection in a relationship can feel like death. And furthermore, why these fears are so deep in our wiring; why our nervous system goes on high alert at the idea of […]
Why Speaking the Truth Feels Like a Threat to Your Survival
How to be honest in a way that respects your fear, and your reality. This post is part five in a series. In the last article, I introduced stage two of “truthing,” the process of learning to speak your truth out loud. In this stage, your mind often “knows” that you’ll be okay if you’re […]
Being Honest in Your Relationship Can Feel Too Risky to Dare
In a previous article, I introduced you to Deb, a woman who was fully aware of her truth, how unhappy she was, and what didn’t work for her in her marriage, but was too afraid to share it with her husband. Deb was smack in the middle of stage two of the “truthing” process, the stage when your […]
Telling the Truth: Will You Survive It? Part 3
Deb is not her real name, but her story is very real for many women. It’s a story I would only write with her permission, and one that I’m hoping will help liberate you from whatever shame and self-judgment you feel when it comes to the state of your relationship and your choice to speak your truth—or […]
Telling Your Truth Should Set You Free, Not Endanger You, Part 2
Busting the myths that keep you silent and afraid. In the last post, I promised to expose the cultural narratives that keep you silent, afraid, disempowered, and unknown, and also clarify what’s actually true. I’ll start by saying this: the stories you’ve been told about speaking your truth are utterly untrue. When you see through the […]
4 Myths About Speaking Your Truth That Aren’t True
You can be honest and discerning; authenticity should not sacrifice your safety. Speaking the truth—your truth—for many women can feel like an unwise and even dangerous choice. If you’ve grown up in this culture, you’ve likely been conditioned by strong narratives, storylines that have taught you how to think about authenticity in your relationships and saying what you […]