How We, as Women, Give Away Our Power
August 22, 2021
Gwen was a working comedian when I first met her. She wasn’t famous yet, but it seemed that she was on her way there. I had never met an artist who pushed herself so hard.
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Why We Can’t Stop Thinking About the Same Problems
April 29, 2021
Have you ever noticed how frequently your mind returns to problems and situations that cause you pain, and insists on rehashing what’s wrong? It’s a strange phenomenon really, our addiction to thinking about problems. Even
You Go, Girl: Growing Up On Cotton Candy Cliches
March 13, 2021
My babysitter gave my 10-year-old daughter a scrapbook. The sparkly pink binder was filled with adorable photos of the two of them eating ice cream, drinking smoothies, ice skating, wearing rainbow wigs, dancing to Tik
What If We Acted a Little Kinder Than We Felt, or Thought?
February 20, 2021
A feeling of joy and relief has arrived for many people in this country. After four years of going to bed with our stomachs in knots, hearts heavy and brains on fire, trying to make
Are You A People-Pleaser at Your Own Expense?
February 11, 2021
Petra was furious when she woke up in the morning—furious at herself. The previous evening, she had met up with an old friend visiting from out of town. He was going through a rough divorce and needed
Surviving 2020, One Panic Attack at a Time
February 11, 2021
Wow, 2020! Our year of anxiety. Many of us are walking around with a sense of trepidation, if not abject fear, in our bellies, and brains. Sometimes it feels like there’s so much to be
Are You Having a Conversation or Seeking Validation?
February 11, 2021
Basic truth: When conversing with other human beings, most of us are inclined to offer an uh-huh, hmmm or head nod every now and again, to let the other person know we’re hearing them and receiving their information. These gestures
Must We Always Be Striving For A Better Life?
November 15, 2020
Switching from the five-year plan to the right now plan… The workshop started with a simple question: What do you want? That question was followed shortly with What is your deepest intention? And then, What do you want to create
Why It’s So Hard to Be (Fully) Honest With Your Partner
November 14, 2020
Jill and her husband had attended a friend’s party, and Jill came home upset. Her husband’s friendliness—and what looked like flirtation—with another woman kept her awake all night, feeling hurt, angry, and threatened. She knew her
We Weren’t Always As Good As We Are Now, So What?
November 6, 2020
Why there’s no shame in crawling before we walk. There’s something profoundly disturbing going on in our culture right now. Well, truth be told, there are a multitude of profoundly disturbing things going on. But
Preparing Your Partner to Listen: The Simple Change in Behavior That Can Radically Change Your Relationship
October 18, 2020
Ava wanted to tell her husband about a troubling and upsetting argument she’d had with her sister. She wanted to process the experience; she wanted his understanding and empathy; she wanted to be heard. But when
Freeing Yourself From Your Partner’s Behavior
October 5, 2020
I recently wrote an article about a client who enjoys her marriage and who also struggles with her partner’s angry outbursts. The article garnered some fierce criticism. To recap: After many years of explaining to her partner
Keeping Your Life Simple, Even After the Pandemic is Over
September 12, 2020
Are you starting to feel anxious about the world opening up, about possibilities becoming possible again? We’re not there yet, but are you feeling a little nervous nonetheless, with maybe even a tinge of loss? For a lot of people, this phase of the
The Harder Life Gets the Softer We Need to Be
September 12, 2020
When life gets hard and things go wrong, the most counterintuitive and seemingly impossible choice is to relax, to soften, and find ease with what’s happening. How can we (and why should we) relax when life feels
When Your Relationship Is Not What You Think It “Should” Be
July 16, 2020
There comes a time in every relationship when you realize that something you think you need and “should” have is not available. What you do when you discover this can determine the future of the